Tuesday 8 June 2010

The Light bulb moment

I have been overweight no! Fat ever since i can remember, through no fault of any one's but my own.
If i was told by my mum that i couldn't have anything then i would create and cry until i got what i wanted. Looking back she put up with a lot from my moods.
All through junior and High school i was always the largest and took a lot of verbal abuse because of this, although at the time i tried to act as though it didn't bother me. Don't get me wrong i had some fantastic friends at school who i am still in contact with now some 25 years later.
On leaving school in 1986 i took an apprenticeship as a pipe fitter, I was probably around 20 stone at that time but being in my late teens/ early twenties and standing at 6' 3 i could carry it of and was always called on if anything heavy required to be forcefully moved or carried.
During my late twenties early thirties i found love and married and finally had a wife and a son. I think i became too content with life and began to add a bit more weight year on year until i reached about 28 stone. My marriage started to break down and i decided that something had to be done so i started at the Gym. 15 weeks later i had dropped nearly 5 stone and thought that things were getting better. How wrong i was, Within the space of a few weeks my wife left and i had been told that my mum( my best friend) had got cancer. My world had come crashing down on me and the only answer was Alcohol, Food and cigarettes.
Whilst my divorce went through and my mum received treatment i just retreated into another world. I would put on a front for family and friends but inside i was heartbroken. In 2005 my divorce was finalised and in January 2006 my mum lost her battle with cancer. I spent the next 12 months feeling sorry for myself and piled on the pounds, the five stone i had lost and another 5 stone on top, i tipped the scales at a colossal 35 stone.
Jan 1st 2008 i was celebrating the new year with family and remembered a promise to my mum so that night i gave up smoking. Two years later i realised that if i had the will power to do this then i have no reason not to lose weight.
I reached my 40Th year in October 2009 and decided then that if i didn't act soon i would not see my 50Th birthday.
In March 2010 my wonderful sister said that she had some vouchers for weight watchers and that she didn't want to go alone so would i go with her. Reluctantly i agreed and went to that first meeting, the only male amongst all those women i had never felt so embarrassed.
I climbed onto the scales and was recorded at 34st 12lbs then i realised i had done it i had taken the first step on this long, long road.
I am now seven weeks into this journey and am pleased to say that i have lost a total of 36lbs. the light at the end is getting a tiny bit brighter.

3 comments:

  1. To my wonderful bro, you certainly know how to make me cry lol - I am so proud of you, and I love you no matter what you weigh, but am glad you have taken this step, and that I will have you here on earth for as long as I am...keep it up Bro you can do it!!!!
    Love always, your Sis xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Paul i think your very brave putting down your reason for losing weight, i wish you well and i know that your mum (our barb)would be proud too.
    ive been following your weight lose on fb with admiration, so keep strong and keep going, i support you all the way
    love and hugs
    Shaz x

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey Drake, very proud of you. Great idea starting the blog brilliant therapy and makes us all think. I agree with everyone else, you're one of the funniest, nicest and most caring people i know...you certainly looked after me at scary pipefitting college. You toughened me up, got me ready for the workplace - teaching me to swear and drink beer...i'll never forget me and Gaz peeping through the Hawkesmore window at lunchtime and saying in unison 'he's having chips!' Foot n' nut (well you know that was just an unfortunate accident).

    You're a great mate and i'm sorry i'm not around or haven't been around these past years when you've had real tough times. We're with you all the way on this. Listen to your family and take strength from them, they love you to bits.

    Don't weaken during the world cup England will still win it without us all getting pissed...just have a bovril and rivita with pickle at half time...now where's did i put my sheepskin overcoat and cap?

    Ginger prince (i've got lot's of names but i've always been fond of this one)

    ReplyDelete